“He who laughs last, hasn’t passed out yet.” ~Anonymous

“All vodka corrupts, but Absolut vodka corrupts Absolutely.” ~Anonymous

“Take it from me, when you are hung over, eat something that will taste good coming back up.” ~ Jason Fox

“I think someone should invent Beerguard, because how often do you actually spill Scotch on the carpet?” ~Anonymous

“Being half drunk is just another way of saying ‘your almost there’” ~Anonymous

“The blood is now running through my alcohol stream.” ~Anonymous

“I prefer both my beer and my coffee to be dark and bitter; that way, they fit in so well with the rest of my life. Anonymous

“Beer - it’s not just for breakfast anymore” ~Anonymous

“A friend of mine stopped smoking, drinking, overeating, and chasing women –all at the same time. It was a lovely funeral.” ~Anonymous

“A night sober is a night wasted, but a night wasted is really fun.” ~Anonymous

“You don’t have to be a beer drinker to play darts, but it helps.” ~Anonymous

“He who laughs last, hasn’t passed out yet.” ~Anonymous

“One pint of beer … equals 1/2 college credit in philosophy.” ~Anonymous

“Beer… helping white people dance since 1837.” ~Anonymous

“Beer. If you can’t taste it, why bother!” ~Anonymous

“Two hands and just one mouth… - now THAT’S a drinking problem!” ~Anonymous

“WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering what the hell happened to your pants.” ~Anonymous

“If nothing beats a Bud, given the choice, I’d take the nothing…” ~Anonymous

“The first thing in the human personality that dissolves in alcohol is dignity.” ~Anonymous

“Everybody should believe in something - I believe I’ll have another drink.” ~Anonymous

“History flows forward on rivers of beer.” ~Anonymous

“How come if alcohol kills millions of brain cells, it never killed the ones that made me want to drink?” ~Anonymous

“Draft beer, not people.” ~Anonymous

“Champagne costs too much,
Whiskey’s too rough,
Vodka puts big mouths in gear.
This little refrain
Should help to explain
Why it’s better to order a beer”
~Anonymous

“Beer - it’s not just for breakfast anymore.” ~Anonymous

“Don’t drink and drive, you might hit a bump and spill your drink.” ~Anonymous

“Beer is the reason I get up every afternoon.” ~Anonymous

“My favorite black-and-tan is a “mother-in-law”: a mixture of stout and bitter.” ~Anonymous

“If I saved all the money I’ve spent on beer, I’d spend it on beer.” ~Anonymous

“Beer is the answer. I don’t remember the question.” ~Anonymous

“Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.” ~Anonymous

“To some it’s a six-pack, to me it’s a support group.” ~Anonymous

“Friends don’t let friends drink Light Beer” ~Anonymous

“Drunk is feeling sophisticated when you can’t say it.” ~Anonymous

“Beauty lies in the hands of the beer holder” ~Anonymous